He is Near

My family has been going though some hard times lately. It has been times that have tested us and are making us.
As human beings living in a fallen world, we all go through hard times, times of hurt, loneliness, grief and struggle.
There are lots of emotions you feel in these times. I can hardly describe the wide range of things I have felt. I have felt deep, deep sorrow and it has struck in areas I didn't know I had and has gone so intensely deep that at times nothing has been able to comfort it, nothing except Jesus. He has been so very near. He has been surrounding me. I can truly say He has carried me in His big arms. He has given me rest for my soul.
If you are hurting, know that Jesus is faithful. If you call on Him, He will answer you. He is near to the broken hearted. He loves you and me so very much, I have learned. He will not abandon you, He has never abandoned me.

“The LORD Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8

Honeymoon Night.

Note: I wrote this story a few years ago but recently stumbled upon it again. The meaning still runs true.------












The moment had finally come. Jestina paused one last time before the mirror. She dabbed at her nose with the last drop of foundation and gently twirled her rogue brush across her cheeks bones. Her freshly curled hair hung long and loose in crisp fine curls about her shoulders. She glanced down; it had been a hard choice between the two equally beautiful new nighties. The Satiny Pearl with its adorable pleats, had fit to perfection around her every curve; and the Ginger Rose which was of such a rich color, had such a lovely way in the gentle, lazy straps that fell loosely over her shoulders; so finally now after much consideration, she had settled on the Ginger Rose.

She now stood ready. Her heart beat wildly as she slowly cracked open the door and stepped softly in the bedroom.
Her eyes flickered up to meet the eyes of her new husband. Sean flashed her understanding smile.

He was so right for her, the perfect match. He was a man of integrity, honor and gentleness. They had bond close in a beautiful way. Never before had Jestina ever felt so accepted and loved by a man. Sean was her dream come true, her gift from God.
She smiled nervously back, her stomach fluttered with butterflies.
Sean sat, propped up against the headboard on their bed; the bed where they would soon unite in a totally new and graceful way.
Jestina's mind flashed back to the past. This bed; the place where she had yet to be physically, but was the place she knew she had mentally visited many times, each time with a different man. Her body had been touched and caressed by many other hands. Twas harmless flirting they said. She had been kissed many times. It was what "everybody" was doing, the dating thing. Her eyes came to rest upon her husband, yes her husband, the one man in the entire world that had deserved it all. But she had thought she enjoyed it; the playful touches, kisses and all the emotions swirled at the time. She couldn't count the number of times since Jr. High that she had lay awake fantasizing about every guy she had set her eyes on. Oh, she had loved it, it had been so satisfying she thought.
But now, all the bits and pieces from her short time pleasures came back to testify against all she had given away.

A single tear rolled down her cheek.
Sean's eyes took in every detail. "Jess" he implored, “What is it?"

Jestina raised her eyes to meet his, "I'm sorry" she whispered, "I only saved you this much."

Crying in My Pillow

I awoke from my sleep, I lay, not ready to face the day. I was overwhelmed by life itself. A constant knot of tension had resided in the pit of my stomach for days.
I couldn't take it anymore. I cried out to God. "Lord, I don't have the the strength to bear this burden anymore. I have no more love to give!" I sobbed. And in the quiet after the storm as my tears melted away I heard within me that still small voice gently question me, "So have you come to the end of yourself yet? Have you run out of your limited store of strength and your ability to love others? Are you ready to accept My boundless strength and endless love? You don't have the capacity, Anne, to love and to give endlessly apart from Me."

I rolled over and cried again, but this time it was because I knew God was right. I had once again trusted in my ability to love others, and had counted on my strength to sustain me. Yet another lesson learned the hard way.

Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:8-10

He answered: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.

Luke 10:27